Recent snaps

What in the world did families do before digital cameras? (yes, I'm joking, but not really...) I love to take pictures of our life here, obviously, but having the luxury to snap away and delete what I choose not to keep is really what makes it possible. If we were paying for film and processing I'd have put us in the poor house. ;-)

Riley the monkey can scramble up the climbing wall lickity split!

Robbie dug a 2'x4' hole in our yard to make a dry well.
Guess who had to get in?
Here he's honing his dramatic skills. Trapped! Like a rat!! ;-)

Ho Hum, sure does look like a lot of work, dad...

Everyone remember singing into the fan? RiRi has just discovered it.
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Going camping!

We're getting ready to pull the pop-up to Mount Cheaha state park to go camping this weekend. Will we get rained out? I sure hope not, because there's a three year old boy in our household who would despair if we had to call it off.

I have lots of pictures to edit so I can post some of them here, so we'll see how much I can get done before I need to get crackin' on dinner.

A budding photographer?

Riley and I were sitting on the porch yesterday when he asked me if he could take a picture of me with my camera. I usually ask him to use his own camera instead, but instead I told him to go ahead, so here is one of Riley's first photographs:

Playing guitar on the porch. At last!

Tappity tap tap!

The little fella has not been himself today.

Ah, but he's not down for long!
For reasons we don't yet know, he considers mittens essential for rollerskating.

The damage is already done.

So they've decided, after many weeks of idiotic deliberation, that they were mistaken in separating the babies and children from their mothers in the Texas polygamy case. Too bad the mistake has resulted in what will have been the most terrifying experience in the short lives of those unfortunate little people.

Finally a porch!

Ever since we moved into this house we've wanted to turn the front porch into a usable space. The porch enclosure that was originally here was so ugly and rotten that we took it down when Riley was a baby. For several years there was no railing and your only option was to sit on the floor. Not pleasing.

Several years back Robbie had some cedar left over from a contracting job and used it to begin rebuilding our porch. It still needs the screen, but for all intents and purposes we have a functional outdoor room. The only thing lacking was furniture.

I've been looking for quite a while, but the only set that really caught my eye was one from the 50's that I found three years ago at a pawn shop. It was made by the Haywood-Wakefield company and includes a couch, two chairs and two tables. The shop wanted too much for it, so I let it go till recently, when I took a chance it'd still be there. To my surprise it was, so I offered the owner a fraction of his original asking price and he accepted it just to get it out of his shop. It suffered an 80's refurbishing at some point during its long life, with gloss white paint over the rattan and cotton chintz upholstering, but we're going to put an appropriate color on the rattan and recover it with some atomic age fabric.

Streamlined beauty!

Ahhh. Finally something to lounge on!

Gratuitous cuteness. Riley swinging "Higher and higher and higher and higher!"

The Life of Riley

We've spent most of the day outside and only just now come in to eat and rest for a bit. Having had disturbed sleep last night and waking somewhat early it's already been a long day.

I remember summer days when I was little as being long and seemingly full of possibility. Does time move differently for children? It's an interesting thought, but I guess it's more likely that each day takes up a relatively larger proportion of their short lives, so it carries more weight.

From what I've observed in the kids I've known, when they're given the freedom to make their own plans and carry them out a kid will fill his time with countless activities which includes plenty of quiet musing. What a life!

Today I had many garden related tasks to do and Riley was doing his thing out back as I did mine. As I was weeding the area near the big oak tree Riley went inside and got some frozen blueberries in a bowl and came back out to munch his berries while he lay in the hammock. I love to watch him watching the world and to hear the observations he makes.

Ah, summer!

Musing

Hmmm! A wee critter!

An Oldie but a Goodie

Our cat Atticus turned 12 years old this April, and for those of you who adhere to the adage that 1 cat year equals 7 people years, that makes him the equivalent of 84 years old. We'd become worried about his health recently as he had been loosing weight and spitting up a good bit. We treated him with hair ball medicine and he seemed to respond very well, but we thought it'd be a good idea to get him checked out regardless. He absolutely freaks out riding in a car and despises the smells and sounds of the vets office and I was loath to go that route, so I called a mobile vet to come to our house. The vet arrived in an RV which she'd had custom built into a fully equipped vet's office and all we had to do was carry Atticus out! Within an hour Atticus was his normal self trotting about the house and she had the results of his exam and blood work. Happily we discovered that our old pal is, in fact, in fine health. We only need to continue to treat him with his medicine and watch for any changes. No kidney issues or any of the other things that plague old kitties. Whew! Knowing how quickly his sister's health failed we were quite concerned, but he's quite well! :-)

In completely unrelated news, last night Riley had a bad dream and woke up at 12:30 asking for me to cuddle with him. I got into his bed and was adjusting the blanket when I felt something move against my leg. YIKES!!! Picture me levitating out of the bed and across the room in a fraction of a second! I had the light on and the blanket flung onto the floor the next moment and was moving the pillows and stuffed animals around on Riley's bed looking for whatever I had felt. My heart was thudding in my chest and I was convinced that a mouse was in the bed, though we all know that Atticus would clue us in to the possibility of any rodent. Riley, thank heavens, only thought it was very funny that I'd flown across the room and was flinging everything this way and that.

Of course there was no mouse, but what it was I could not for the life of me figure out, and I stood there in the midst of the blankets and toys for a long minute before I spied the orange nerf ball that Riley had stuck in his shirt last night. I'd forgotten that he'd brought it to bed and there it had been under the blanket. When I pulled the blanket it rolled the ball and in my sleepiness I mistook it for a creature! It really freaked me out. :-/

Oh, really?

Out of nowhere this evening, having had no previous discussions or images of birth, Riley said "I didn't like all the blood on me when I came out of your belly". What does he remember? He didn't elaborate.

Directly afterwards he went seeking a specific ball he needed. Once found he put it inside his shirt and said he's going to have a baby in two hours! I asked him if it was a boy or a girl and he said that it's going to be a little brother named Banty. Well then!

Faux nature and real nature

Marveling at the tiny shells and creatures.

One of the things we were keenly aware of at the resort was that there was no place to recycle. Here at home we have a place for garbage, but it's not used much because we try as much as possible to buy things that won't end up in the land fill. And we compost whatever we can, so our garbage can is really the last choice. At hotel we had one choice: the garbage can. And boy did I feel weird every time I had an empty box, a grocery bag, a water bottle or the core from an apple. No recycling, no compost. Only trash. As if we're not walking a thin line. :-/

Sigh.

We were also enjoying finding remnants of old Florida there in the midst of the endless gawdawful high rise condos. Every once in a while we'd see some great old font or a minty green cinder block one story rental place and I could picture the Florida I used to hear about back in the early 70's. The Sunshine State! Smiling Oranges! Bright, chalky colors! I loved that.

Fun!!

Home again, home again, jiggity jig

We're back in the 'Ham! We decided to come home a day early since Robbie's got to leave out to travel to Mississippi this coming week and needs to regroup before hitting the road again.

Here are some photos from the last day or so. Of course, the day we left the sky was blue, the wind calm and the water pristine. Ho hum. ;-)

Dark skies and choppy water does not deter us!

It's so great to be at the beach! Lets run into the water five billion times!

Ready, set GO!!

From a Midwesterners perspective, this place is totally amazing!

Cheese! ;-)

Beach beach and more beach

It's been crazy windy down here and the beach patrol has the red flag flying, so we've been staying clear of the water. Plus, yesterday Riley and I both got sunburned despite having slathered in sunscreen before we left the hotel room. Apparently the California Baby sunscreen is not waterproof. :-/

So this morning, while Robbie finished at the exhibition hall, Riley and I went to the beach and flew his kite for a while. The kite essentially flew itself and it took a firm hold to keep it from taking off. Robbie's done for the day and we're off to see what we can see! :-)

Here are some more photos:

Last night on the way to dinner he totally sacked out.
That is one tired little boy.

Surprise!!!
Did I mention the silly factor of the the hotel room? ;-)

Kite flying on the beach!

Wow, it flies all by itself!

Beach!

Hello Gulf of Mexico! It's me, Riley!

Robbie had a conference to attend, and lucky for us it's being held at a resort on the gulf of Mexico, so we're in Panama City, Florida!

Of course the moment we got out of the van Riley wanted to go straight to the beach, so as soon as Robbie got back from setting up his exhibit, we were off!

It's a little on the cool side, considering that it's May in Florida, and the waves are very choppy, but Riley's totally into being in the water. It's a far cry from when we came when he was 18 months and again when he was 2 1/2, when he was not at all interested in getting in the water.
This time he approached with caution, but after about 15 minutes he was pulling us by the hand and saying "Let's get in there!".

Wow! This tram goes really FAST, Dada!

The edge of the continent. Very interesting!

I don't think we're in the 'Ham anymore.

I believe I'll pause to have my treat.

Ha! As if a parent can luxuriate on the beach while
in the presence of a three year old. I totally set this one up. :-)

There's something about staying in a hotel room that makes kids especially silly!

Mommas play day

We had some of Robbie's family over for a get-together today, which was a lot of fun. The five and under set played like play was going out of style, and when all was said and done there were many tired boys. A boon to any momma!

It's late so just a few pictures to share.

Yahoooooooooo!

The surprising hit of the day: Worms!
The compost pile was THE place to be.

I have a fist full of worms!

And last but not least, a picture of our darling child asleep.
He chooses to sleep crossways in his bed for reasons we do not know.

A wooden leg named Sniff

Riley loves, loves, LOVES the movie Mary Poppins. Specifically, he loves the chimney sweeps. Not only are they allowed to get into the fireplace but they in fact pew up the fireplace! (Pew, by the way, is a Rileyism, meaning something along the lines of zoom. To say the word pew correctly you must say it as if the word itself is blasting off) And if the fireplace thing wasn't enough, they dance, flip and hang upside down by their feet. Riley is sincerely impressed with these guys!

The movie has also delivered into the McClendon house a joke which Riley really appreciates the hilarity of, but which he doesn't understand one bit, which offers it's own hilarity to the adults in the household. Those of you who know the movie will remember that a key element in the plot involves a joke told by Michael Banks which goes something along the lines of The first fellow says 'I know a man with a wooden leg named Smith' and the second fellow says 'What's the name of his other leg?'. Much laughter ensues, and in the end the joke actually does one character in. But here at the McFamily house, Riley is three years old, and while he knows what a joke is, he can't deliver one properly yet, nor does he understand that Smith is a surname. So to hear Riley tell it, the whole entire joke goes "A wooden leg named Sniff!" That's it, folks!

Regardless of the lack of a buildup or the fact that it makes absolutely no sense, we all end up laughing anyway because it really is very funny.

I guess we're all done then.

Riley's been out of diapers during the day for some time now, but we'd been putting him in a pull-up at night since there were still times when he'd need it. Just within the last several weeks though something has shifted, because he's been dry every morning and once he's been up for a minute or so he'll go use the bathroom.

Three nights ago when I was getting him ready for bed I grabbed a pull-up as usual, but when I held it out for him to step into he said "No, I'd like to wear 'out-and-abouts' instead". (Which are the waterproof Imse Vimse training pants we used to put on him when we went out and about) I told him that it would mean that he'd need to go pee before we got his jammies on and he'd need to get up in the middle of the night if he had to go to the bathroom. He said that's fine, so we put on the training pants. In the morning he was dry and when he was ready he went to the bathroom.

Last night I reached for a pull-up but again he said he'd like to wear out-and-abouts instead, so we tried it again and again he did just fine. Unless something happens to cause a big change, it appears that we're done with pull-ups.

The whole potty training thing has been surprising to us, since we ultimately found that the more we involved ourselves in the process the less progress he made. When we began I kept him in a diaper or pull-up during the day and commenced to ask him to go to the bathroom when I thought it was time. Silly me. Ask a two year old to do something that they have control over and guess what their reply will be? No! Seeing that it could easily become a no-win power struggle, I talked to friends whose children had moved into underpants already. (All of them girls, by the way. An interesting difference in gender.)

I finally took heed when a friend told me to just put a potty right where he spends his time, put underpants on the child and let him figure it out himself. With nothing to loose I decided to give it a try. Sure, there were times when I'd have to grab a towel and we'd clean up (involving him in that was helpful to both of us) but suddenly he made a big leap in understanding and control. And by the way, he didn't soil any furniture or rugs. (actually there was one time when it surprised him as he was on the rug, but he stopped when he saw what was happening) That was what had held me up, but just as my friend said would happen, he didn't do it.

We totally avoided bribing, guilt and shame to get him to use the toilet, since we don't believe those things are good for any relationship, but in the end, once he showed us that we needed to let him do it his way, he was done! Clever lad that he is! :-)

Beautiful little boy

I know every child is beautiful and every parent is biased, but sometimes I just swoon when I look at this little person.

A fire hydrant is a fine place to perch, don't you think?

Riley discovered a fabulous secret place within a circle of forsythia bushes at the park today.

And by the way

Just want to say that on occasion I indulge myself with my opinions on a variety of subjects, usually related to children. This venue, being invite only, is unlikely to reach beyond the eyes of folks who already know how I feel about kids, so clearly I'm preaching to the choir in some respects. Mostly it gives me an avenue to express myself, and you may or may not feel like reading what I've written, so by all means don't feel obliged to stand around while I take to my high-horse bully pulpit. ;-)

Photos from the weekend

Whew! Another weekend come and gone. I've heard that time moves faster as you get older (or at least that's the perception) and I'm really aware of that these days. There are so many items on my to-do list and honestly there don't seem to be enough hours in the day to do them all. Of course there's the constant-company-of-the-three-year-old issue, which adds infinite complication to every task, but still the days seem to fly by in the blink of an eye!

It's finally stopped raining on a weekend for long enough for Robbie to get some brick laid on our garage and it's lovely! Tidy and sturdy enough for the ages. I planted our hanging baskets and the bed beneath the Japanese maple with cosmos, Mexican heather, sweet potato vine, portulaca, verbina and zinnias and they are very cheerful looking! Riley's jobs consisted of swinging on the porch and finding mud to play in. He applied himself to the tasks with great earnestness.

Robbie's gone out of town till Wednesday or Thursday at the latest, so little R and I will be holding down the fort here. We have lots of things to take care of before we travel with Robbie to Florida (Panama City Beach of all places!) for a conference next week. The conference is held at a resort on the beach and we'll be staying in a 'chalet' with a kitchen, so I'd like to take plenty of stuff for us to eat. Trying to find wheat-free meals while traveling is beyond tiresome, so I'll just cook our meals instead.

And now on to the photos!

Riley and his five year old cousin Andrew.
They form a mutual admiration society.

Running, chasing, and more running! That pretty much says it all.

Who knew how much fun a pop gun could be!?

My, what a handsome man! :-)

Hey look! It's us, again! Riley's parents!

I find these interesting still life settings around the house and have begun photographing them. They're very telling in their own way.
Riley's fire hat doubles as a carrier for his 'babies'.

A little breathing room

I've been reading some interesting articles recently on giving kids room to do their own thing. This one, The Over Parenting Crisis, is well written. The author, Katie Allison Granju, is someone I used to be on a small parenting email list with waaaaaaay back when I first began exploring parenting in the mid 90's.

I like to read her articles and to see that her kids, all of whom were parented in an attachment style, including extended nursing, have grown into strong, independent individuals.

When Riley was a baby he was a big nurser and preferred to view the world from his cozy spot on my hip, nestled in the sling. Normal primate baby, basically. His bright brown eyes could be seen following conversations, and watching me write checks, make meals, weed the garden and all the other essential minutia of daily life. I can't count the times people would notice him following what was going on and would say 'He doesn't miss a thing, does he?'. Nope, he doesn't.

Now he's three he strikes up conversations of his own and wanders freely out of my view. He takes risks, figures things out, strides with his head up and exudes a happy confidence. I don't think it's a coincidence.

I was talking to a friend at the park yesterday whose daughter is not quite two. She said she wonders if her daughter will ever grow out of the need to be held quite so much or will ever go to out of town relatives when they reach for her. She said that it's been awkward on occasion because some of her family members believe that she's making her daughter clingy by her attachment parenting style. I told her that needing reassurance and balking at strangers sounds pretty normal for this age and that Riley was exactly the same way. She watched him balance along the low stone wall around the perimeter of the playground and walk to the far side of the park to pick up pine cones and we laughed at how 'clingy' my child is. We talked about the differences in how a two year old and three year old interact with the world and about how hard it is to remember what's actually normal for kids when our culture seems to make a point of drumming babyhood out of babies as soon as they emerge from the womb.

I don't believe that pushing a baby away will ever do anything but instill a sense of isolation, fear and mistrust. Can a baby find her way from there to independence? (and I mean real independence rather than bluff) I'm skeptical. Will she be strong inside? (and again, real strength, not posturing) I doubt it. Responsive, consistent care and an introduction to their world as a safe, interesting place makes strong, independent kids. How did we get so far away from that? All the animals in the world have it down pat, for crying out loud.

Our culture dictates that we need to get our babies away from us as soon as possible and then spend the remainder of the kids lives climbing all over them. It's just bizarre. Another good article is this one on Over-Parenting and Social Disaster.

More photos

A cape, a Santa hat and a lunch bag. Essential for scooter riding!

In a secret cave

Strong, long and lean! What a boy! :-)